Koinonia in Silence

“….that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead” (Phil. 3:10-11).

Share—the Greek word many of us know, koinonia. “Fellowship, association, community, communion, joint participation, intercourse.” It surprises us here in this context. The koinonia of his sufferings. A far cry from the coffee “koinonia” gathering after the Sunday church service.

The koinonia of his sufferings:

As we cry out in pain as we see loved ones wander from Christ.

As we bear physical pain with patience and perseverance.

As we bear with the jokes of colleagues at work.

As we continue to serve our non-believing spouse despite his unwise selfishness.

But as we enter into the fellowship of his sufferings, as we suffer with joy because we know him deeper, we elevate him as more supremely valuable than our comfort, health, money, control, security, whatever, we show him to the world. We have a prophetic voice.

Suffering may seem to strip us of our voices, our ministries, significance, purpose, etc. But we are given a new voice. A voice like Job’s that echoes in the heavenly courts and silences the satans and awes the angels of the divine council. A voice that stands in contrast to all the vain promises of this world. A voice that speaks of his presence with us.

Yet....

           ......deeper into his sufferings, deeper kononia…. The silence of God.

Deeper than the nausea, the achy joints, the headaches, the gnawing pain in my abdomen, the overwhelming fatigue…. Deeper than the cry of so many years…. The silence of God. "Just one word. Just one sign. Please, God…."

But on the cross, Jesus cried out. Silence from his Father.

Jesus faced a deeper, darker silence than I ever will. A far greater silence than I know. So he could walk with me, so I could walk with him. So we could have koinonia, in the suffering and in the silence.

Nor does silence mean God is not working. He was silent while Christ was on the cross, but he was still working for a glorious resurrection. Perhaps he was silent during the many years of Joseph’s stay in prison, but he was still working. He works in the silence. We may not hear him. We may not receive the guidance, the clear word, the tangible sign…. But God is working in the silence, using the silence. Purposeful silence. Perhaps, perhaps, we FEEL Christ in the SILENCE. Koinonia. Deeper than the words I wanted. Presence, thick. Holy in the pain. 

Yes, Lord, yes. O, to know you. I will say yes, to YOU, even in this. Even in silence. You. Koinonia.